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springsodasNot willing to talk about this too much at a length, but there's something I have been thinking a lot about recently. I still enjoy a lot of things adjacent to fandom—I like drawing fanart, I like writing fanfic, I like making OCs, and I do indulge in the occasional AU every now and again. I also enjoy talking to people about my favorite shows, comics, and video games—not only is it a great way to meet friends with similar interests, but it's fun to come up with theories and "what if" scenarios together because, sometimes, there was something we really wanted to see out of the story, but then it didn't deliver for some reason. In that regard, I enjoy the fanbases that spring up around the media I enjoy.
But a wise Youtube comment I once read made the distinction between fanbase and fandom, where fanbase broadly refers to all the fans of a given franchise—the casual enjoyers, the fanartists, the fic writers, the cosplayers, the collectors, the convention-goers, the people who make video essays, and those whose community participation is exclusively through discussion. Fandom is a whole different matter and I'm not sure how to explain it without accidentally making the whole thing out to be spaces full of nothing but crazy people. (Which, to be fair, a lot of ridiculous shit has gone down both in real life and online because people got too... invested in their favorite franchises.Kōhei Horikoshi being sent death threats for not making BakuDeku canon at the end of MHA is neither the first nor the last time fans have threatened bodily harm to creators over shipping.)
I think the best way to put it is that I am finally starting to grow out of fandom, and I don't mean that in the sense I've gotten too old for it. It's more that I am finally starting to open my eyes to a lot of the gripes and criticisms of fannish communities, ones that I used to turn a blind eye to because I thought people were just being judgemental, but now realize aren't entirely unfounded. I won't name any of the specifics because, again, I don't want to paint these communities in a purely negative light, but at this point? I get it. I get why so many people choose to steer clear of fandoms. While there are plenty of nice people who participate in those communities (I know because I'm friends with them), there are also a lot of people who make them absolutely insufferable spaces to be in and all it takes is a few rotten apples to ruin the entire barrel.
It's a little bittersweet because when I think about why I got into fandom, it was the community aspect. I was one of the "weird" kids growing up who struggled to make many friends and since my family generally isn't into the same stuff I am, fandoms were the only places where I was able to talk to people about the things I enjoyed and find the social acceptance I couldn't get in real life. But it was also a form of escapism and, ultimately, a distraction from my issues in real life. I'd even argue it was actually holding me back from making any real progress in my life. I mean if there's so much security and comfort to be found here, why leave and face reality? (Said as if I don't constantly experience anxiety and fear that exactly one poorly-worded post that goes against the popular take is all it'll take to get me blocked, bullied, and kicked out of the community.)
The irony is that, again, I like talking to people who enjoy the same things I do. I like making things based on whatever franchise is the current hyperfixation. And I like sharing those things with others. If we're looking at things purely from that perspective, I'm happy to refer to myself as being a part of a fanbase, whichever one that may be. But my viewpoints on fandom have shifted a lot in the last few years and I just don't look at those communities the same way I used to back when I was in my teens and early/mid twenties. More importantly, now that I've been involved in the streaming gig for about a month, I'm starting to look towards video editing and posting to Youtube, both to help advertise my Twitch channel and to explore other avenues of creativity, so I just have other things to focus on now.
I'm still not entirely sure what this means for the future—I'm still in charge of one or two fannish communities and I don't see myself stepping down from the admin role despite being less inclined to actively participate in them—but there is a part of me that's kind of glad to finally no longer be tying myself to a culture I have, admittedly, become increasingly frustrated with. I just wish there wasn't this sense of isolation knowing it's for viewpoints that I don't think anyone I know really shares.
But a wise Youtube comment I once read made the distinction between fanbase and fandom, where fanbase broadly refers to all the fans of a given franchise—the casual enjoyers, the fanartists, the fic writers, the cosplayers, the collectors, the convention-goers, the people who make video essays, and those whose community participation is exclusively through discussion. Fandom is a whole different matter and I'm not sure how to explain it without accidentally making the whole thing out to be spaces full of nothing but crazy people. (Which, to be fair, a lot of ridiculous shit has gone down both in real life and online because people got too... invested in their favorite franchises.
I think the best way to put it is that I am finally starting to grow out of fandom, and I don't mean that in the sense I've gotten too old for it. It's more that I am finally starting to open my eyes to a lot of the gripes and criticisms of fannish communities, ones that I used to turn a blind eye to because I thought people were just being judgemental, but now realize aren't entirely unfounded. I won't name any of the specifics because, again, I don't want to paint these communities in a purely negative light, but at this point? I get it. I get why so many people choose to steer clear of fandoms. While there are plenty of nice people who participate in those communities (I know because I'm friends with them), there are also a lot of people who make them absolutely insufferable spaces to be in and all it takes is a few rotten apples to ruin the entire barrel.
It's a little bittersweet because when I think about why I got into fandom, it was the community aspect. I was one of the "weird" kids growing up who struggled to make many friends and since my family generally isn't into the same stuff I am, fandoms were the only places where I was able to talk to people about the things I enjoyed and find the social acceptance I couldn't get in real life. But it was also a form of escapism and, ultimately, a distraction from my issues in real life. I'd even argue it was actually holding me back from making any real progress in my life. I mean if there's so much security and comfort to be found here, why leave and face reality? (Said as if I don't constantly experience anxiety and fear that exactly one poorly-worded post that goes against the popular take is all it'll take to get me blocked, bullied, and kicked out of the community.)
The irony is that, again, I like talking to people who enjoy the same things I do. I like making things based on whatever franchise is the current hyperfixation. And I like sharing those things with others. If we're looking at things purely from that perspective, I'm happy to refer to myself as being a part of a fanbase, whichever one that may be. But my viewpoints on fandom have shifted a lot in the last few years and I just don't look at those communities the same way I used to back when I was in my teens and early/mid twenties. More importantly, now that I've been involved in the streaming gig for about a month, I'm starting to look towards video editing and posting to Youtube, both to help advertise my Twitch channel and to explore other avenues of creativity, so I just have other things to focus on now.
I'm still not entirely sure what this means for the future—I'm still in charge of one or two fannish communities and I don't see myself stepping down from the admin role despite being less inclined to actively participate in them—but there is a part of me that's kind of glad to finally no longer be tying myself to a culture I have, admittedly, become increasingly frustrated with. I just wish there wasn't this sense of isolation knowing it's for viewpoints that I don't think anyone I know really shares.
(no subject)
Date: 2026-04-25 08:41 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2026-04-26 11:44 am (UTC)i know we have very different... idk what the word(s) would be. comfort capacities? so, me checking the 2003 tag daily and interacting only with the posts i have something to add on or art i want to share/help out the artist by reblogging is usually easy (the most frustrating aspect for me, personally, is filtering out the rottmnt posts that have fallen into the tag because someone just tagged all iterations in their vague post). that way i'm "giving back" to the community in a small way (sharing art), and i'm also recognizing usernames, staying 'updated', and kind of getting a sense of where the community is without direct involvement. another thing that might also have kind of 'helped' me stay just outside the fandom is that... --i think i have ocd tendencies when it comes to tags. >xDD like. if i scroll through someone's blog and they don't consistently tag their posts, i probably won't follow-follow them, but i might check their blog semi-weekly. if someone doesn't have a tagging system, my blacklist isn't gonna do much to defend me or make my morning backread faster. and it's a shitty feeling sometimes! i have a handful of folks i'd LOVE to follow-follow, so they know i'm there, but... they don't tag their posts! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ and i don't expect everyone to be as militant about tagging as i am, i know it's very much my type-a and order-loving personality. and i'm trying to get myself to be more flexible with this dumb-brain-rule, but it sure is pulling teeth.
it's a weird tight-rope to walk, especially when you still want a sense of community and interaction without throwing yourself in the deep end and struggle with anxiety. i've said before that's a big part of why it took me so long to step into turnips; i'm easily overwhelmed by fast-moving and crowded spaces, and i'm aware that i tend to not only have firm opinions but a lot of those don't align with with the more accepted/popular fanon/ideas. and on top of that, i find that folks online don't always respond well to "eh, it's not for me" or "i'm not interested in that". the vibe i get is often defensive? i'm trying to express where i am on the subject neutrally or maybe remove myself from the conversation without 'leaving the room', so to speak, i'm not saying the subject is bad. but that's how it's sometimes taken. aaaaand that gets very exhausting to deal with. xD;; this of course could be a failing on my part, or just the aspect of tone being lost in text. hard to tell.
ALL THAT YAPPING TO SAY: fully understand the sense of isolation. i'm still trying to figure out the best way to navigate it all while keeping my brain from becoming complete static, but also encourage folks to not be so passive when interacting with creatives and do what i can to help more creatives be seen. i dunno. stupid man-thing, i'm fuckin' ballin'.jpg