Writing biographies is hard...
May. 2nd, 2026 12:40 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
springsodasI've been trying to write up something to put in my About page over on Neocities so that I can finally make a little progress towards finally making use of my site, but... well, explaining who I am and what I do is a little tricky. Like okay, I do art, I do writing, I stream on Twitch, and I've become something of a proponent for utilizing alternatives to corporate social media and web services, but how do I talk about that? Unless you're asking me about the shows I watch, the games I enjoy, and the characters I gush over, I can't talk about things at a length for shit.
On a less pleasant note, besides the creeper who showed up in my chat who asked me to friend him on Discord likely so he could hit on me in private, the VOD for my Sims 2 stream last night was muted and it's even worse than what happened with one of my Stardew Valley streams; first, it got muted in two areas for around 2 - 3 minutes each, which is already annoying. But unlike last time where Twitch got the in-game music mixed up with an AI "cover" that didn't even try to sound different from the original, this time... it's literally just the in-game music. Like full stop, the literal audio, which is covered under fair use for streaming purposes. And while I can be a little forgiving of one of the songs because it's an actual classical piece, the other was just one of the build themes. Like what the fuck, Twitch?
Anyway, I'm looking towards my goals for May this month, a lot of which is self-improvement kind of stuff. Some of it is basic "being a human being" like fixing my sleep schedule, eating healthier, going outside, and getting more exercise, but I also wanna work more on properly blocking out my time and budgeting my money; I know I'm being a Captain Obvious when I say "things have gotten expensive," but... things have gotten expensive. Really expensive. So expensive that I pretty much told myself that I'm going to spend this month figuring out how much of my expenses go towards necessities like food, clothes, and household supplies so that I know how much money I can put aside for things that are "for fun." I also need to finally sit down and get my room cleaned up. I've been living in a pigsty for ages and having a clean space to live in would do wonders for me. (It's mostly just... starting, really. And also making sure to sort things into bags of "keep," "donate/sell," and "toss," and arranging things with my parents so we can do the second.)
I'm also working more on managing my mental health better... I mentioned in my last post that I struggle a bit with intrusive thoughts and actually doing what people say and just letting the thought happen while acknowledging it is just an intrusive thought is doing a lot to alleviate the distress/anxiety I feel when one happens and make them go away faster. (It even works when dealing with a sudden, angry thought. Huh.) I'm also reminding myself that it's okay to make and create things I enjoy while still being critical of the mentalities surrounding them. I've realized recently I've been holding myself back from drawing and writing things I want to make because some people might see them as contradictory to my views. I mean I have some pretty harsh criticisms of shipping culture, yet I do enjoy drawing and writing romance-focused fanworks. Isn't that kind of hypocritical on my end? And that ultimately ends up leading to a lot of unnecessary stress, which is incredibly exhausting and just... demotivates me from making anything at the end of the day.
There are quite a few other things I'm trying to be better about, but some of those are probably worth discussing at another time if I feel like it. Right now, I got a R.E.P.O. session with friends coming up before tonight's House Flipper session and I am very excited for that.
On a less pleasant note, besides the creeper who showed up in my chat who asked me to friend him on Discord likely so he could hit on me in private, the VOD for my Sims 2 stream last night was muted and it's even worse than what happened with one of my Stardew Valley streams; first, it got muted in two areas for around 2 - 3 minutes each, which is already annoying. But unlike last time where Twitch got the in-game music mixed up with an AI "cover" that didn't even try to sound different from the original, this time... it's literally just the in-game music. Like full stop, the literal audio, which is covered under fair use for streaming purposes. And while I can be a little forgiving of one of the songs because it's an actual classical piece, the other was just one of the build themes. Like what the fuck, Twitch?
Anyway, I'm looking towards my goals for May this month, a lot of which is self-improvement kind of stuff. Some of it is basic "being a human being" like fixing my sleep schedule, eating healthier, going outside, and getting more exercise, but I also wanna work more on properly blocking out my time and budgeting my money; I know I'm being a Captain Obvious when I say "things have gotten expensive," but... things have gotten expensive. Really expensive. So expensive that I pretty much told myself that I'm going to spend this month figuring out how much of my expenses go towards necessities like food, clothes, and household supplies so that I know how much money I can put aside for things that are "for fun." I also need to finally sit down and get my room cleaned up. I've been living in a pigsty for ages and having a clean space to live in would do wonders for me. (It's mostly just... starting, really. And also making sure to sort things into bags of "keep," "donate/sell," and "toss," and arranging things with my parents so we can do the second.)
I'm also working more on managing my mental health better... I mentioned in my last post that I struggle a bit with intrusive thoughts and actually doing what people say and just letting the thought happen while acknowledging it is just an intrusive thought is doing a lot to alleviate the distress/anxiety I feel when one happens and make them go away faster. (It even works when dealing with a sudden, angry thought. Huh.) I'm also reminding myself that it's okay to make and create things I enjoy while still being critical of the mentalities surrounding them. I've realized recently I've been holding myself back from drawing and writing things I want to make because some people might see them as contradictory to my views. I mean I have some pretty harsh criticisms of shipping culture, yet I do enjoy drawing and writing romance-focused fanworks. Isn't that kind of hypocritical on my end? And that ultimately ends up leading to a lot of unnecessary stress, which is incredibly exhausting and just... demotivates me from making anything at the end of the day.
There are quite a few other things I'm trying to be better about, but some of those are probably worth discussing at another time if I feel like it. Right now, I got a R.E.P.O. session with friends coming up before tonight's House Flipper session and I am very excited for that.
(no subject)
Date: 2026-05-02 08:48 pm (UTC)and i dunno how to answer the shipping culture question, because like... i guess i don't really know what qualifies one for being "part of shipping culture". i don't think it's hypocritical to have your opinions on how most of fandom handles and approaches shipping while doing your own shipping things. what'd be hypocritical would be if you were to say "the concept of shipping is dumb" and then go make ship-centric stuff.
me saying i don't tend to like anime but then having a handful of anime i love doesn't make me hypocritical, it's more a statement that this thing generally doesn't work for me but there're times that it has. i can be critical of tmnt 2003--you've seen some of it--but i'm not a hypocrite for continuing to love and make art for the show. it's not bad to be critical of things you love; often times that critique comes from a desire to see the thing be better more than disliking the thing. if there're aspects of shipping culture you're critical of, it'd only be hypocritical of you if you did them yourself. and if that's the case, maybe that needs a bit of reflection and unpacking.
godspeed in your REPO session. u-u/ may the odds be ever in your frying pan, something something.
(no subject)
Date: 2026-05-03 12:14 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2026-05-03 12:22 pm (UTC)